As a quick follow up to my rantings on job hunting I came across this posting on craigslist looking for a copywriter. The ad was incredibly fun to read and I actually enjoyed replying to it. Turns out there are some people still looking to creatively qualify applicants and when I went to their website I was ecstatic at the lack of questionnaire. The posting read as follows:
AAAA Central Pennsylvania thinkbank needs another player on the team. Quixotic copywriter needed for take-no-prisoners, full-service thinkbank. Must be able to churn and burn long format and deliver dead-on conceptual work. You get: enough room to swing a cat, win glory, write for high level nationals and internationals, and all the java you can stomach. Send three and only three compelling samples, resume and salary history to jwebb@pavone.net. Pavone, a thinkbank.
My response was:
Dear Mr./Mrs./Ms. (In no particular order) Webb, I read your posting on craigslist and I am VERY interested in the position. I am looking for a new career and after reading your ad I am very excited about the prospect of having enough room to swing a cat. I have long arms for my build and generally require a good foot extra in feline wielding space. Beyond my predilection to cat swinging I feel I can bring the creativity under pressure the job would inherently necessitate. As my resume will indicate my sole qualification for this job is...I think I'm right for it. Creative writing and visual projects have been a hobby of mine for years. Once I pieced together a picture book during my last hour at work that made fun of everyone living in my small town. The picture book was a hit, even with those singled out and poked fun at for everything from their lack of teeth to public drug use. I have been encouraged by all those who have read my fiction, humor, and journalistic style venting to write full-time, perhaps even for a living. Should I write a book I would have at least a dozen copies sold within the first hour after release. At least a dozen. I will direct you to my two blogs, The Uncouragement and Golf Potato for examples of my writing. If nothing else it should provide you with a decent distraction from work and may lead to office jokes at my expense. As for compensation I typically haul in a pittance per year and my beautiful wife is in the medical field (Lancaster General Hospital) providing us with exceptional medical/dental so I have no need for any additional benefits. Thanks for your consideration and I hope to hear from you soon with either a yea or nay. Until then I'll put on a pot of coffee and warm up my cat arm.
I haven't heard back from them...and I won't. It was fun getting nowhere though.
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