Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Money for Sale!



With all of the billions of dollars floating around you'd think we wouldn't be in as bad a scenario as we are.  With banks getting billions of our dollars in bailouts (to some that publicly said they didn't even want the money) and not having to tell anyone what they're doing with it, or even justify that position, it would seem as though the good times should still be rolling.  Case in point, the two dollar bill.  For the holiday season the Treasury released a limited two dollar bill with gold accents.  Each gilt Jefferson will be proudly be protected and displayed in a pleather case with foggy resin plastic lining.  As a reward for not doing anything wrong and getting screwed by those who did, the government would like to offer you the tax payer a set of four of these limited two dollar bills for the basement price of $48.  That's right! For just $48, or four easy installments of $12, you too can have $8 in U.S. currency!

As someone who has worked with 22kt gold leaf, the very same that adorns these bills, I have an extra insight into how much the gilding adds to the Tommy J.  One dollar at wholesale.  A box of five hundred sheets of 22kt gold leaf goes for about $500.  One sheet would get the job done on each bill so add a buck to the value.  So after stealing our money and giving it to rich folks the government would like to sell you some currency at four times it's face value.  I need to hide a Caganer in the Oval Office.  

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Holy Crap


I am not a huge fan of Christmas. More specifically I can't stand what Christmas has become; a high pressure, credit busting, sale hunting, eBay gouging, employee killing consumer circus. Recently I was turned on to two Christmas traditions from the Catalan region of Spain that I can totally get behind.  These are centuries old, therefore taken seriously and legit.  The first is the hiding of the Caganer in nativity scene. Who is the Caganer? He is The Pooper. Yup, The Pooper. This cute little porcelain fellow has dropped trou and is defecating (defecation included) somewhere around the newborn son of God. Like a "Where's Waldo Taking a Dump?" kids try and find the little crapper as part of the holiday joy.

The second Catalan Christmas tradition of note also, oddly enough, has a poop theme. The Caga Tio, or Shit Log, is the equivalent of a yule log in big, big trouble. For starters the log has a face painted on it, human or animal. It is kept around ornamentally until the special day comes and it will be set ablaze. However, before reaching the flame that will be it's end the children beat the log mercilessly. Then when the innocent hunk of wood is deemed to have been thoroughly throttled it is tossed into the fire. As it burns the children chant songs requesting the log poop out presents for them. I can't make this stuff up.